What You Are

Oddly, some of my closest friends are audiophiles. I am not.

I have, on occasion, been called tone-deaf. Woefully so. Yet, I am comfortable with this condition that keeps me from both learning Mandarin as well as appreciating that angelic melody on -insert band name here-'s b-side track!

I take even more pleasure than most at "singing", at the top of my lungs, my favorite songs in the car. I'll rock out in the shower with the best of them. I just know that I'm terrible; but it's okay!

This does not mean that I do not appreciate good music. I love my music. Really, I do. I have just come to grips with the fact that my opinion of music is not generally shared by people for whom good music cannot be found on iTunes.

(This blog here... well, it do be my soul. Not that I'm ashamed, or anything, but...)

For example: I run to Avril Lavigne. (The old album, this new one blows.) Seriously. I have caught so much crap for this. Oh, well. Despite the voluminous library of my iPod, I have been absolutely unable to find a set of tracks that just keeps me going one more mile. Somehow, she does it for me.

More: as I type this, I am listening (attentively, mind you) to Evanescence. I love Amy Lee. I have pushed my way to the stage with the hope of her just sweating on me.

My most recent iTunes purchases were: 1) a complete James Brown library. (Okay, this one probably makes me less uncool,) and 2) Metallica's S&M.

My point is that my tastes are varied, but certainly not audiophilic. I am utterly incapable of participating in a discussion among friends about the greatest lead guitarist ever. Or the relationship between Cream and Led Zeppelin.

See? I'll bet the audiophiles about whom I write are just this second saying, "that doesn't even make sense! There is no relationship between Cream and Led Zeppelin."

Which only serves to prove my point.

Nonetheless. All this mindless, circuitous prattle is meant to be a preface to my intended purpose here, in this post.

...to share a song to which I recently listened, and which I think is terribly apropos of today's thinking about my crisis.

Apologies to those that think Audio Slave sucks.

And when you wanted me

I came to you

And when you wanted someone else

I withdrew

And when you asked for light

I set myself on fire

And if I go far away I know

You'll find another slave

(chorus)

Cause now I'm free from what you want

Now I'm free from what you need

Now I'm free from what you are

And when you wanted blood

I cut my veins

And when you wanted love

I bled myself again

Now that I've had my fill of you

I'll give you up forever

And here I go far away

I know you'll find another slave

(chorus)

Cause now I'm free from what you want

Now I'm free from what you need

Now I'm free from what you are

Then a vision came to me

When you came along

I gave you everything

But then you wanted more

Does this make me as bad as a lovelorn teenager making a mix tape?

Oh, well. It's me.